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Pregnancy Blues

June 14, 2013

IMG_2171Week 35 – The baby is 5 1/2lbs and is over 18 inches long, about the size of a honeydew melon. He has shifted down a bit so breathing is easier these days, but as the result, there is more pressure on my bladder. Hemorrhoids, digestion sensitivities, constant urination, aching feet, raging hormones, and grumpy mood – the last month is proving to be hard to bear. It feels just about when you hit mile 23 in a marathon. You’ve covered an enormous distance. You made it further than any of your training runs, but you still have over 3 miles to go and it’s no longer fun. You start wondering why in heck’s name you ever signed up for this race. You are in pain, and you just want to be done already.

I’ve run two marathons. I graduated from one of the most competitive engineering programs in Canada while working two jobs. I sold flowers on the streets in –10 degrees Celsius. Yet pregnancy is the hardest and most selfless thing I’ve had to endure (and from the stories I’ve heard from other pregga ladies, I’ve had it pretty good). Nothing can be more annoying than when a skinny teeny twenty year old girl in the gym smiles at you and says “Looking at you makes me miss being pregnant. I loved carrying and delivering my babies!” (What drugs are you on? And where can I get some?)

The first rule of Pregnancy Club is that you don’t talk about what happens when you are pregnant to never-been-pregnant gals. You tell them that having babies is the most amazing thing you’ve ever done (and it might be the case, I am yet to experience crossing that line.) Once you meet a newly pregnant lady, that’s when you welcome her to the club by unleashing every gross and scary detail of what the poor thing might expect over the next very long and torturous 40 weeks. The good thing there are tons of other pregga ladies that are eager to commiserate together so making friends is a breeze.

pregnant club

Things I will never take for granted:

  • bending down
  • tying my running shoes
  • getting off the couch (on the first try)
  • lying on my back or belly
  • twisting to look back rather than doing a full body turn
  • sitting while leaning forward
  • shaving
  • cutting toenails
  • high heels
  • clear skin

There might not be a miraculous feeling lighting you up with a maternal glow, but there are some positives to being pregnant.

Things I will miss after delivery:

  • thicker hair
  • extra flexibility
  • eating dessert without feeling guilty
  • not trying on a bunch of outfits before leaving the house (if it does not smell and still fits, it’s good to go)
  • not having a fat day
  • my husband constantly kissing and rubbing my belly
  • having an excuse to spend all day in PJs lying on the couch
  • a wardrobe full of stretchy fabrics (no zippers, buttons or belts)
  • my almost outie (who knew I had a birthmark at the bottom of my belly button?)
  • knowing exactly where my baby is and what he is doing at all times

Nothing cheers me up like a tasty treat, so I baked a Lemon Berry Oat Bread (recipe below).



  • 1 cup of whole wheat flour
  • 3/4 cup of oat bran
  • 1/2 cup of sugar
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 cup low-fat, lemon flavored yogurt
  • 1/4 cup vegetable oil
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 tsp grated lemon zest
  • 1 cup of fresh or frozen berries



1. In a large bowl, combine flour, oat bran, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.

2. In a medium bowl, whisk together yogurt, oil, eggs and lemon zest.

3. Stir wet ingredients and flour mixture until moistened. Gently fold in berries.

4. Bake at 350 degrees in 9×5 loaf pan for 50 minutes.


Enjoy warm with butter or cooled with coffee or tea!IMG_0373
After a hefty slice covered in butter, I hear rumbling outside and notice our two feathery neighbors flying back and forth from the nest they’ve built in the front entry cove of our house. As I step outside to look what the fuss is all about, a couple of little heads peek down at me from the nest.


As I watch mom & dad zooming by like two F-16s, I can’t help but marvel at their dedication and selflessness to take care of their young (who will leave the nest and probably never even come visit). Our DNA is hardcoded to procreate. Every gene in our body is designed to replicate to fulfill our ultimate goal of  reproduction. I mope about the discomforts of pregnancy and dwell over sacrifices that I have had to make over the last eight months. At the same time, I remind myself that this is the most selfless and rewarding thing my husband and I will ever get to experience, and as far as the nature is concerned, we are fulfilling our primary role by enabling human race to go on. Nothing ever will be as important as having our own youngling to take care of, so he also can spread his wings and fly one day leaving our nest (but let him dare not to call or visit his mother!)

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Kristin permalink
    June 14, 2013 6:55 am

    Don’t worry – after the baby you will get to live in running clothes too – esp if you keep up your workout/running regime. I call it my mommy uniform.

  2. thebabydoctorswife permalink
    June 14, 2013 10:17 am

    I don’t know if this helps, but you look AMAZING. I am only 26 weeks and can only hope to look like you do. You are truly motivation for me. I already have those days where I feel huge, and wonder how I have gained so much weight and start to miss so many things that I can no longer do….but then I remember that this time will pass so quickly, and I know looking back we will have such fond memories of it.

    Things become nostalgic once they are over, don’t they? So ignore that silly girls who talk wonders about pregnancy and birth, because I can guarantee they felt like we do at some point too. It is NOT easy. Hands down the hardest thing women do.

    Keep your head up beautiful mama!!!!

    • June 14, 2013 4:07 pm

      Thanks for all the compliments. I am certain you’ll look beautiful all through your pregnancy. From the photos, you look taller than me (I am only 5’4) so the baby will have more room which hopefully will make things a bit more comfortable. The feet will get worse and worse with every passing week (not to scare you). This is where those super hubbies come in 🙂 Enjoy your second trimester. It’s by far the best. The beginning of the 3rd trimester is not bad either.

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